Q: Is that a goat?
A: No, Dan says she's a rare horned labradoodle. The hooves are a genetic mutation. Don't stare at them, it's makes her self-conscious.
Q: I know that's a goat, but what breed is it?
A: Nigerian Dwarf. They are a miniature dairy breed, slightly taller than a Pygmy.
Q: That thing has horns. Is it a billy goat?
A: Most breeds of goats have horns, including the females. Some owners choose to remove the horns for the safety of the goat or other humans. I find that they make convenient handles when needed.
A: She was born mid February 2013, so she just turned 5 last month. A goat's life expectancy is similar to a dog. 12-15 years.
A: Yes! EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. Sometimes I drink it, but most of the time I'm too lazy to sanitize the equipment so I just feed it to the dogs. Whole cow milk is around 5% milkfat, but Nigerian Dwarf milk is over 10% milkfat. It nourishes the dogs so much that it cuts my dog food bill in half. Dan adamantly refuses to even taste the milk, saying that it would be like drinking Piper's milk.
A: About 3 cups per day. It's the perfect amount to have a nice cold glass with a ham sandwich or for making gravy in the morning. It tastes like super whole whole milk, but with a very slightly sweet almond-y flavor.
A: Yes, there is a lot of red tape for traveling with a goat. If we are actively moving we have to get her a Certificate of Veterinary Inspection every thirty days that meets the health and testing requirements for our destination. Luckily we only have to do this four times a year as we are stationary for a few months twice a year. Each certificate costs anywhere from $20-$200, and she has to have permanent ID in the form of ear tattoos and ear tags.
Q: What do you feed her?
A: We carry a bale of compressed hay along with a bin full of pellet goat food. She also has a mineral supplement and probiotic that she eats daily. Generally she eats about 2 cups of pellets and four to five buckets full of hay every day. For treats she gets to be our garbage disposal unit, devouring banana peels, orange skins, mango peels, corn husks, and other veggie scraps. Rosie also grazes outside on whatever vegetation is available when the weather is nice and there are no dangerous predators nearby. Over the course of a year I probably spend about $200 in goat food.
Q: Will goats really eat anything?
A: Actually they're pretty picky but in a weird way. For example, Rosie loves crunchy leaves, cigarette butts, plastic bottle caps, wine, and bark from trees. Cigarette butts are the bane of my existence. Don't you smokers know that I have a nicotine-addicted goat because of your littering?! She loves banana peels, but only when they're in your hand and haven't touched the ground. And if you haven't touched dog food recently with that hand. And only when she feels like she likes it. But sometimes only if it's on the ground and not in your hand. See what I mean?
Q: What is her personality like?
A: I generally tell people that she's basically a dog with a cat's personality. She knows her name but won't respond to it. She knows what "no" means, but doesn't care what it is that you don't want her to eat. She walks on a leash, but if she wants to stop she will plant her feet and act like you're trying to strangle her or just simply lay down and refuse to budge. But even though she's stubborn she is a wonderful trip companion. On hikes she follows behind and nibbles on plants, then kicks up her heels and dances around just to hear her hooves making clattering noises on the pavement. She doesn't chase or bark at wildlife. and she's always up for quiet contemplation of the scenery paired with a good scratch between the horns.
Q: Isn't she lonely? Goats belong in a herd.
A: We are the herd. It's true that goats are herd animals, but if you get one young enough you can emotionally bond with it to become its herd. Generally this is done by bottle feeding a baby that did not get to nurse. I acquired Rosie at a very young age along with her sister and another goat at a farm I was living on at the time. She bonded with me and my dogs, and when I left the farm she came with me. She has never seemed to miss other goats, and in a couple of situations where she met other goats she didn't seem to understand that she was a goat too. She likes to play with the dogs, although now that her horns are a bit bigger the dogs are wary of them and steer clear.
Q: Why did you bring a goat with you on the road?
She was my pet, and when I acquire a pet it is for life. She enjoys traveling, and if she didn't I'd happily let her live on a farm. I won't abandon my animals just because my lifestyle changed.
Q: Is she truly happy?
A: I think so! Most days she just lays around, indoors or outdoors, contentedly chewing her cud and absorbing the scenery and sunshine. On rainy days I can tell that she understands that she's in a nice dry comfy warm bus and she quite smugly watches the rain soak everything outside. Her pen is at eye level with all of the windows in the back of the bus so she has the best view. When we go on walks she kicks up her heels and bounces all over the place. If she ever seems sad I give her a good brushing and a massage. If that's not a spoiled rotten goat I don't know what is!
Q: Can I pet her/feed her/take pictures of her?
A: Yes! In fact, her backpack says, "PET ME! FEED ME! LOVE ME!" She is very photogenic, and enjoys being petted, especially between her horns. Sometimes small excited children startle her and she may gently headbutt them, so I always tell children to be calm and quiet and pet her on the back or side. You can attempt to feed her any plant, veggie, or fruit, but check with me first in case it's toxic to goats. She also may just reject it based on her own arbitrary snack approval system. Watch out, because you might try to feed her a carrot while instead she swipes your cigarettes, wine, and your camp chair's mesh cupholder.
Q: Does she get along with the other animals?
A: Rosie loves dogs. So much, in fact, that every time she escaped the temporary pen at my parents' house I would find her across the street playing with the neighbor's husky dog. When her horns were small and less pointy and accurate weapons, Piper and Juno would play chase with her and she would chase them back. Now they're scared of her because she's a bit of a bully sometimes. She's just playing how goats play, though, and that includes headbutting. To relieve her headbutting needs she usually finds a small tree and has a nice fight with it. She also has a headbutting wall in her pen. Think of it like a bell that she rings when she needs room service. AKA more hay. Rosie and the cats have come to an understanding and sometimes the cats hang out with her in the pen. They like to sit in her hay bucket. George's rabbit hutch used to be inside Rosie's pen, but he requested a room change because she would headbutt his cage to try and steal his lunch. He's much happier now in another room with no naughty neighbors.
Q: How do you keep the bus from smelling?
A: Here's my conclusion in regard to this subject. If I didn't have a goat, my house wouldn't smell like a goat anymore. But then I wouldn't have my goat and what fun would that be?
Rosie makes about 5 gallons worth of nanny berries (goat poop) a week. It all goes into the bottom of her pen and down a drain into a bucket under the bus. Every single day I remove a whole plastic shopping bag full of goat, cat, and rabbit excrement from my bus. Add that to picking up dog poop and dumping our black tank, and I have a poop covered life. Daily I sweep the floor, and weekly I wipe down the whole bus with sanitizer. Dan also cooks in here with lots of oil and garlic, and we have all of these critters shedding everywhere and tracking in dirt. Most people who come into the bus say it has a "petting zoo" type of smell. It's ok if you couldn't stand to live in it; the good news is you don't have to! My goal is to be able to sniff my clothing while I'm in town and decide that I don't smell goaty today. Then go home and snuggle my lovable goat.
Q: Why does she make that funny face?
A: That is called flehming. Goats, horses, cats, and other animals have a vomeronasal or Jacobson's organ located on the roof of their mouths. In response to certain smells they will open their mouths in a funny grimace to pass the scent over this organ. Most of the time when Rosie pees she smells it and makes this face for a few seconds. I've heard that you can train a goat to make this face when you point at it so that it can laugh at your jokes.
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